Number One has become very interested in the Periodic Table. So much so, that he is contemplating going into the field of science (yea!!). I can see his brain working as he looks at those spots labeled Undiscovered. He asked if we could find a list of items and the elements that they contained on the internet. Well, we tried, but nothing really came close to what he was looking for. So you can imagine my excitement when I found this lurking on our school shelf in the basement.



That's right, the most common uses for every single element! It also has a charts that show the boiling point, melting point and other fascinating facts. Last night, he found something that left us laughing. No, the best way to describe it is to use a very southern phrase. We hee-hawed. Oh my. We laughed so hard even the babies were laughing.




Did you know that slowing down Superman is a recognized scientific use of Krypton? Me neither.

~Annemarie

There are some definite changes taking place in our household. Our youngest is now officially a toddler, even to the point of almost keeping up with the big kids. Number 3 and Number 4, between whom there has been a bit of tension since the birth of Number 4, are beginning to show signs of sharing a friendship that I know will be the best friendship of their lives. And I am totally breathing a sigh of relief over that. It was touch and go for a while there as Spunkster's main goal was to inflict as much harm as possible on Rocky. Now, Spunkster delights in making Rocky laugh, which is fairly easy because that kid adores his big brother.

The girl child is showing signs that mature thought is just around the corner. She is becoming aware of her thoughts existing independently from us. I like that. It is after a young person comes into that awareness that they can develop a deep, abiding relationship with Christ.

My oldest is is blazing full speed ahead toward. . .well, to be honest, I am not sure what. He is responsible, thoughtful, and quiet. I regularly pray that God will lead him in the direction that he needs to go. That his interests will be shaped in such a way that help in his life later on.

Me? Well, I know that anyone who has been a Christian very long, will tell you that there are highs and lows. Times when you feel very close to the Lord and times when it feels that you are in a pit hollering away with the feeling that no one is listening. The latter, has been my experience for quite some time now. I have struggled, making my pray echo this one that I read recently in The Valley of Vision:

Help me to honor Thee by believing before I feel, for great is the sin iof I make feeling a cause of faith.

For the past two years, I have felt so physically drained that the only way to describe how I go about my daily activities is trudgingly. Which is apparently not a word, according to the ominous red squiggly line. Go figure. Some days I have despaired of ever feeling normal again. I have struggled with the horrendous thought that that this is the new normal. Which is not only a scary thought, it is a thought that has thrown me into the depths of despair. (A little Princess Bride allusion there.)

Again and again, I have turned to Psalm 42.

Psalm 42

¹ As the deer pants for the water brooks,
So pants my soul for You, O God.
² My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When shall I come and appear before God?
³ My tears have been my food day and night,
While they continually say to me,
“Where is your God?”

⁴ When I remember these things,
I pour out my soul within me.
For I used to go with the multitude;
I went with them to the house of God,
With the voice of joy and praise,
With a multitude that kept a pilgrim feast.

⁵ Why are you cast down, O my soul?
And why are you disquieted within me?
Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him
For the help of His countenance.

⁶ O my God, my soul is cast down within me;
Therefore I will remember You from the land of the Jordan,
And from the heights of Hermon,
From the Hill Mizar.
⁷ Deep calls unto deep at the noise of Your waterfalls;
All Your waves and billows have gone over me.
⁸ The LORD will command His lovingkindness in the daytime,
And in the night His song shall be with me—
A prayer to the God of my life.

⁹ I will say to God my Rock,
“Why have You forgotten me?
Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?”
¹⁰ As with a breaking of my bones,
My enemies reproach me,
While they say to me all day long,
“Where is your God?”

¹¹ Why are you cast down, O my soul?
And why are you disquieted within me?
Hope in God;
For I shall yet praise Him,
The help of my countenance and my God.


This passage articulates the cry of heart. My soul thirsts for Him. I know that this dry time will pass. And whether or not my physical health ever returns, I can still praise Him. In the meantime, when I am burdened with my sin (which is frequently), I am comforted by the fact that He is coming again and then I will be free of this sinful flesh. And I cry out with all of my heart, let it be today!

~Annemarie

I rarely grieve the passing of time. Nope, that's just not me. There is nothing in the past that so holds my affections, that I desire to go back rather than forward. Oh, sometimes I am tempted. As a mother of four children, there are days when my mind drifts back to my brief time as a single adult and the thought of being responsible for no one other than my self, frankly, that looks pretty inviting. But then I remember how consumed I was then with another desire. What desire was that, you ask? Ha-ha....it was the desire to have what I have NOW. I don't know about you, but I find that to be very funny. Isn't that the way that way that we humans always seem to view life? Never content. Always wishing for something more, something less. It reminds me of when I was in college and I was sitting in a bible study, a girl named Michelle shared this verse:

1 Timothy 6:6

⁶ Now godliness with contentment is great gain.

I remember thinking how interesting is was that it said godliness with contentment. That word with, in the Greek, is μετὰ (meta), which in English can be translated as accompanied. I used to wonder at this because I thought, can you even have godliness without contentment? I mean, it seemed to be that part of being godly, was being content. Now that I am older, I see more clearly that a person can indeed be godly without contentment. The word for contentment is αὐτάρκεια (autarkeia) which can be translated contentment or sufficiency. Sufficiency... that is so interesting.

Are my current circumstances sufficient? Another place this word is found, in the Greek, is:

2 Corinthians 9:8

⁸ And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work.

Having all sufficiency in all things. So it would appear, that according to God's Word, YES, my current circumstances are sufficient for me to have an abundance for every good work. And it doesn't take a scholar to look at my life and see what good works lie in my daily path.

• Honoring, respecting and loving my husband.
• Teaching my children the Word of God.
• Keeping my house in order by cooking, cleaning and doing what needs to be done.
• Aiding my children as the grow in knowledge, as their homeschool teacher.

That's a very short list, and yet just focusing on those is enough to keep me hopping!

Well, this blog post has taken an entirely different turn from where I thought I was going. That seems to happen to me a lot. But I needed this reminder, the reminder that God has given me all I need to accomplish what is on my plate at this very moment. This moment being the one where I change as many as 12 diapers a day, where I usually get to really talk to my husband for 20 minutes a day, right before I go to bed, where adult contact is seldom, where there are days that I just have to trust that God will provide for all of our financial needs. I know that as time marches on, His grace will be sufficient to see me through other circumstances, too.

He is so faithful!

~Annemarie

I try to set aside Sunday as my blog day. But today, my mind is simply too full to sort it out into a coherent blog post. I tried, I failed.

More than ever, I long for the return of my Savior.

~Annemarie

This has been a rough week for our family. My sweet Number 4 received his one year old vaccinations on Wednesday and it must have happened in concurrence with the cutting of a tooth, causing him to be the crankiest of babies for a solid 3 days. Now under normal circumstances, with a normal baby, this would have been hard. It was exceptionally hard for us because Number 4 rarely, and I really do mean rarely, cries. My heart has been breaking for him and his hurts.

However, I was truly blessed this week by watching how my two older children rose to the occasion and simply stepped in to entertain our crying baby whenever needed, with no complaining. Their patience astounded me. Definitely not what I would have expected from a 10 and 8 (almost 9!!) year old.

*sigh*

They are growing up so quickly. Parenting is the scariest role I have ever had. I tremble at the thought of this awesome responsibility, that's a wordy way of saying that sometimes it freaks me out. I love these kids and sometimes I wonder why God planned flawed, sinful adults to raise flawed, sinful children. There are moments when that is definitely not the best combination. What I saw this week was not a testament to mine or my husband's parenting skills, but rather it was picture of a God who answers the heartfelt prayers of parents. So thankful for that!

I am thinking of doing a school post. I say thinking because I wonder. . . is anyone really interesting in our daily school happenings?

Here's a small Spunkster (aka Number 3) story before I sign off. My two oldest children still call me Mommy. I have told them over and over that they will have to switch to Mom at some point because I don't want teenagers calling me Mommy, though my husband tells me that in the South, that is perfectly acceptable. . . not with this mother! Well, Spunkster has many ways of calling me and Mommy is not on the list. His favorite is still Moga. The other day I was coming home from getting my hair trimmed and he, throught the screen door, saw me walking up the steps. I heard him yelling "Moga! Moga! Moga!", you know, like I was returning from war or something. Then, as I opened the door, he said "Hi Mom." That kid is SO funny. And not just in a two year old way. He has a sense of humor that is almost adult like. And he is brilliant. And handsome. . . sorry, my motherly pride started taking over there.

~Annemarie

It was a cool, crisp morning. My list of things to do was long and varied. Among this list sat my chief task, make a pie for the church fellowship. Being the most important, it was at the top. The Pastor had issued a call apple pie, but not just any apple pie, his Aunt Sally's Famous Apple Pie. He even provided the recipe in the foyer. I had made apple pies before, even a few good ones, but this recipe called for many ingredients that I was unsure of. As I got to work I found the task more difficult than I had first thought. I was forced to make many substitutions as I went, for I simply didn't have what the recipe called for. Finally they were all ready. Though I had struggled somewhat in the process, I looked at the end result with pride. The golden, fluted edges of the crust hinted at the delectable filling underneath.

When I arrived at the fellowship dinner I saw others entering with pies. The tables were loaded with sumptuous looking pies. I was pleased to see that my pies looked to be some of the best. With great eagerness I stepped in line and took a plate and fork. I bypassed the other pies for a taste of my own. As I cut the first slice I was greeted with an odd, unpleasant smell. It was an odor associated with rottenness. I sat down hesitantly to taste what I was now very unsure of. The first bite brought tears to my eyes. The fruit was rotten, the spices were all wrong, and I had used salt instead of sugar. In utter agony I watched as some of my closest friends took slices of my rotten pie. How in the world could my pies, which looked so wonderful, be so awful!

For so many Christians, this is a picture of their spiritual life. They hear the recipe for living a good Christian life and they spend their life trying and trying to get that recipe right. Some even look really, really good on the outside, golden and perfect, but inside they are full of rottenness. When others get close, or a rough situation hits them...look out! Jesus said:

Matthew 23:27

²⁷ “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs which indeed appear beautiful outwardly, but inside are full of dead men’s bones and all uncleanness.

Yes, he said hypocrites! He also said:

Matthew 7:21-23

²¹ “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. ²² Many will say to Me in that day, ‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’ ²³ And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!’

And Paul wrote this under the directing of the Holy Spirit:

Galatians 5:22-23

²² But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.

If you are a genuine believer, then your fruit will be genuine. When I was growing up, I heard numerous speakers and preachers tell me, when the devil causes you to doubt your salvation, point to the date you were saved and tell him to shut up. As an adult, I have learned that the bible never teaches us to claim our salvation based on a date in the past. It says:

2 Corinthians 13:5

⁵ Examine yourselves as to whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Do you not know yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you are disqualified.

You need to examine yourself and compare your present behavior with God's Word and then you will know without a doubt whether or not you are saved. The first step is conviction of sin. One of the most common verses used in evangelism is:

Romans 3:23

²³ for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,

It's easy to memorize, but do you really accept and agree with the fact that you are a sinner? Are your sins abhorrent to you? Do you realize that they cause you to be separated from an utterly Holy God? If you have never been truly convicted of your sins then, my friend, you have never experience true salvation.

Is your pie full of real fruit of the Spirit or is it full of fruits of the flesh? Are you Saved or Self-Deceived?

~Annemarie

If you have never read any of the Puritan's writings, I recommend them. Recently, through an unexpected blessing, I received The Valley of Vision, which is a book of collected puritan prayers and devotions. The title piece so reflects my last post that I wanted to share it with you.

~Annemarie

Lord, high and holy, meek and lowly,

Thou hast brought me to the valley of vision, where I live in the depths but see Thee in the heights; hemmed in by mountains of sin I behold Thy glory.

Let me learn by paradox

that the way down is the way up,

that to be low is to be high,

that the broken heart is the healed heart,

that the contrite spirit is the rejoicing spirit,

that the repenting soul is the victorious soul,

that to have nothing is to possess all,

that to bear the cross is to wear the crown,

that to give is to receive,

that the valley is the place of vision.

Lord, in the daytime stars can be seen from deepest wells, and the deeper the wells the brighter Thy stars shine;

Let me find Thy light in my darkness, Thy life in my death, Thy joy in my sorrow, Thy grace in my sin, Thy riches in my poverty, Thy glory in my valley.

The other day, I walked outside and, although it was not a cool morning, there was something in the air. It was the smell of fall. Not the deliciously obvious smell, nope, it was much more subtle than that. But it was there! Fall causes me to rejoice. I am not a lover of summer. It has it's plus side, like fresh garden vegetables and...well, I am sure there are other things. But for me, the heat, humidity and bugs start to really become intolerable around August. OK, really it starts to intolerable around June 20th, but I am trying to be positive here. The best thing about summer though, is the way it makes fall so...so amazing!

I used to live on the central coast of California and I have to tell you that I really never thought about how wonderful the weather was. It just was. Period. I thought that 70 with low humidity all year round, with the occasionally rainy day in January and February was normal. I never appreciated it, I just expected it. But just as the trials in my life make the easy times that much sweeter, the heat (and BUGS) of summer, make the fall that much more refreshing. The changing seasons hold a promise and create appreciation that I have never experienced before.

This is an illustration that I remind myself of often. Why? Because right now, with two little boys and two older children, I am going through a very busy and tiring season of life. And I remind myself that it is a season. It will pass. Changing 17 diapers a day will not always be the norm. The littles will out grow their tendency to cry over everything. They will. I know because my older two have.

In the meantime, I am finding that the Lord is faithful to supply totally unexpected blessings that sustain me.

~Annemarie

A few months ago, a friend gave me Thomas Watson's All Things For Good. Because I have many other reading commitments, I have been reading it very slowly. I am amazed at how this book ministers to me right when I need it and how I need it. This morning, this practically had me in tears.

3. The evil of desertion works for good to the godly.

The evil of desertion works for good. The spouse complains of desertion. " My beloved had withdrawn himself, and was gone " (Cant. v. 6 Song of Solomon). There is a twofold withdrawing; either in regard of grace, when God suspends the influence of His Spirit, and withholds the lively actings of grace. If the Spirit be gone, grace freezes into a chillness and indolence. Or, a withdrawing in regard of comfort. When God withholds the sweet manifestations of His favour, He does not look with such a pleasant aspect, but veils His face, and seems to be quite gone from the soul.

God is just in all His withdrawings. We desert Him before He deserts us. We desert God when we leave off close communion with Him, when we desert His truths and dare not appear for Him, when we leave the guidance and conduct of His word and follow the deceitful light of our own corrupt affections and passions. We usually desert God first; therefore we have none to blame but ourselves.

Desertion is very sad, for as when the light is withdrawn, darkness follows in the air, so when God withdraws, there is darkness and sorrow in the soul. Desertion is an agony of conscience. God holds the soul over hell. " The arrows of the Almighty are within me, the poison whereof drinks up my spirits " (Job vi. 4). It was a custom among the Persians in their wars to dip their arrows in the poison of serpents to make them more deadly. Thus did God shoot the poisoned arrow of desertion into Job, under the wounds of which his spirit lay bleeding. In times of desertion the people of God are apt to be dejected. They dispute against themselves, and think that God has quite cast them off. Therefore I shall prescribe some comfort to the deserted soul. The mariner, when he has no star to guide him, yet he has light in his lantern, which is some help to him to see his compass; so, I shall lay down four consolations, which are as the mariner's lantern, to give some light when the poor soul is sailing in the dark of desertion, and wants the bright morning star.

(1). None but the godly are capable of desertion. Wicked men know not what God's love means, nor what it is to want it. They know what it is to want health, friends, trade, but not what it is to want God's favour. You fear you are not God's child because you are deserted. The Lord cannot be said to withdraw His love from the wicked, because they never had it. The being deserted, evidences you to be a child of God. How could you complain that God has estranged Himself, if you had not sometimes received smiles and tokens of love from Him?

That last paragraph is SO encouraging.

~Annemarie

This has been one of the longest years of my life. Normally, as I approach one of my children's birthdays, I marvel that a whole year has passed. But as Rocky's birthday nears, I find myself saying, "Has it really been only a year?". It feels like he should be entering Kindergarten. Why? Well, the answer to that demands bullet points.

• A year ago this week, my friend Marsha's sweet 3 1/2 year old son, passed from this earthly life into heaven. More than anything else, her and her family's grief and praying for them daily, has marked this year for me. Watching her cling to the truth in God's Word, seeing things from an eternal, biblical perspective, and hurting with them, has caused the light and momentary trials on this earth to seem petty. All the difficult situations that I have encountered this year have been filtered through this.
  
• The birth of my 4th child. This would have been huge no matter what, but being an emergency c-section (after 3 natural births), threw me for a loop. I was not prepared for the long, arduous recovery or the intense pain. I knew ladies that had had them, and never heard one complaint from them (my mom had THREE!). As it turns out, when you have a natural birth to compare it to, it is much harder. For instance, with a natural birth, you feel pretty much normal by your 6 week post-pardum appointment. With a c-section, at 6 weeks, you are wondering if you will ever walk upright again.
• Dealing with the post-pardum swing in my thyroid. That happens after every pregnancy, but this time through, I was able to clearly see that no matter what I was feeling on the inside, outside God's Word clearly states that my behavior is to be holy and righteous.

Actually, that's enough bullet points, because that last one sums up what this year has really been about. Realizing that no outward circumstance give us an excuse to sin. Not intense grief (Marsha, you are such an example in this!), not physical pain, not mental turmoil. There is not a separate Bible for each situation we encounter in our lives. There is no verse that says:

Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers, unless your hormones be imbalanced, then feel free to yell at your children, fight with your husband and indulge in copious amounts of self pity, dwelling on how bad your lot in life is.

I read that and think how ridiculous that sounds, but, I can look back over my life and think of many times that I have used circumstances in my life to serve as an excuse for unbiblical, sinful behavior. There is no extra set of biblical instructions for hard times. We are to live according to God's Word at all times, in all circumstances. Does that sound harsh? Try this on.

1 Peter 1:16 (New King James Version)

¹⁶ because it is written, “Be holy, for I am holy.”

Um, yeah, that says holy.

One of my favorite John MacArthur quotes (for which I can never find the source!!) is this:

"I am often asked if I am tired. My answer is 'Of course. I am always tired. That is life. I get up tired, I go to bed tired.' "

That is a big excuse around this house, and I think everywhere. Very few people are blessed with the energy to do what they need to do without fatigue. You know what? That's life. It's not an excuse for me to act lazy, unkind, whiny, blah, blah, blah. It's just not. This last week was a big week, being our first week of school. I think that I experienced exhaustion at a new level. The baby was up during the night, but I still had responsibilities come morning. You know what? It is absolutely possible to meet those responsibilities with joy and kindness through the power of the Holy Spirit. Actually, that is fruit of our salvation and it is what should be seen in our lives if we claim Christ. It is what I pray is evident in my life to those who live with me on a daily basis.

~Annemarie

ps. This verse really goes like this:

Ephesians 4:29 (New King James Version)

²⁹ Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.